Everything To Guppy

Episode Archive

Episode Archive

542 episodes of Everything To Guppy since the first episode, which aired on February 13th, 2018.

  • Episode 513: Flat Penny

    July 26th, 2020  |  20 mins 45 secs

    "Don't bother," the hallucinatory Chil'trox snarled, "I have a proposal that will allow you to more than make up what you hyper-owe."

  • Episode 512: Pay To Play

    July 25th, 2020  |  12 mins 11 secs

    "Chil'trox, baby!" he shouted with synthetic cheerfulness, "If this is about those megacreds I still owe you from the Altrazian gig, believe me, the hyper-check is in the space mail!"

  • Episode 511: Pupula Duplex

    July 23rd, 2020  |  17 mins 5 secs

    Attempting to appear as non-chalant as a man can while the scenery is spitting on him, Stargash adopted his standard "talking to bureaucrats" face—a sort of scowling simper, with topnotes of reverence and pique.

  • Episode 510: No. 2

    July 21st, 2020  |  18 mins 27 secs

    "Stargash!" the avatar of unpleasantness belched, a hallucination of warm, wet spittle flying freely from its techno-organic mouth.

  • Episode 509: The Chest

    July 19th, 2020  |  23 mins 42 secs

    Hallucination antrons, meanwhile had the benefit of being completely silent, at the deficit of forcing their recipient—Stargash, in this case—to experience the nightmarish sight of perfectly good mechano-worm components re-shaping themselves into the scowling visage of his least favorite bureaucrat.

  • Episode 508: Bursting Sack

    July 18th, 2020  |  14 mins 47 secs

    Invasive, yes, but it also enforced a certain politeness; Stargash had had to spend the better part of a week being serviced in the MacroDoc after a particularly malignant comment about his table manners had managed to lodge itself in his lower intestine.

  • Episode 507: Restock

    July 16th, 2020  |  14 mins 5 secs

    There were less pleasant ways to communicate messages across the interstellar distance—Stargash had once breakfasted with a tribe that spoke exclusively through inducing appropriately shaped tumor growths in the skin of their conversational partners.

  • Episode 506: Host Hat

    July 14th, 2020  |  17 mins 51 secs

    Stargash's stomach performed a few queasy tumbles as the messenger antrons efficiently hijacked his sensory neurons, and the bulkhead ahead of him suddenly hallucinated itself into the unctuous scowl of Chil'trox of Pliny.

  • Episode 504: The Road From 500 Pt. 4

    July 12th, 2020  |  19 mins 38 secs

    But he preferred skipping out on such obligations to either; he was halfway out of the spaceworm's cramped aft gut cabin when the psychic onslaught of a p.o.'d bureaucrat began pinging across his synapses.

  • Episode 503: The Road From 500 Pt. 3

    July 11th, 2020  |  15 mins 56 secs

    Of the two, he found he tended to prefer pissing off those in power; their vindictiveness tended to have limits, even if those were simply the borders of the nearest star system.

  • Episode 502: The Road From 500 Pt. 2

    July 9th, 2020  |  16 mins 9 secs

    That meant either money or power was knocking at his door, and Chip Stargash had run afoul of both in his times as a Star Soldier For Hire.

  • Episode 501: The Road From 500 Pt. 1

    July 7th, 2020  |  21 mins 2 secs

    Which meant that either the sac was developing an eating disorder, or that someone with Priority One Anti-Digestion Insurance was trying to get hold of him.

  • BONUS: Hell Comes To Harkness House, The Audiobook—Chapter 1

    July 6th, 2020  |  23 mins 19 secs

    Hey, folks! Future Will here.

    This is a silly little bonus I'm tossing onto the feed to celebrate the Episode 500 milestone. It's an audiobook I've recorded of the first chapter of Hell Comes To Harkness House, the extremely silly serialized novel I write in the episode descriptions of Everything To Guppy. (Really, go back and look.) It's dumb and silly and I don't say all the words right, but I figured I'd put it out there for people to enjoy.

  • Episode 500: The Everything To Guppy 500th Episode Spectacular

    July 5th, 2020  |  33 mins 29 secs

    Not wishing to hear from the creditors he had spent the last four cycles so aggressively dodging, Stargash had set the sac to auto-digest any messages directed toward his e-dentity.

  • Episode 499: The Road To 500 Pt. 3

    July 4th, 2020  |  16 mins 50 secs

    As consciousness kicked the door down and ungratefully barged its way into his brain, he became aware that the worm's messenger sac hovering over his slumberpod was near-full with sticky communiques.

  • Episode 498: The Road To 500 Pt. 2

    July 2nd, 2020  |  19 mins 28 secs

    Still clinging to the last erogic gasps of hypersleep, Chip Stargash did his best to ignore the pulsing, fluidish sound.