Everything To Guppy

Episode 484: Turdlings

June 7th, 2020  |  18 mins 10 secs

The gates of Heck were now 6 inches dilated, and growing by the minute; the Fel Barons laughed inside their comfortable cages; the great Goat of the Umpocalypse let out its warning bleat; and what rough beast, its hour come round at last, was now slouching toward Hoopty Hut to be born?

END OF CHAPTER ONE

Episode 483: Lost Fly

June 6th, 2020  |  15 mins 27 secs

And as the three Doomed Souls stood their, locked in a state of uneasy truce before the gates of the great and sinister Hoos, the sky above them roiled and squeezed.

Episode 482: Friend Zone

June 4th, 2020  |  11 mins 27 secs

"My name is Harvey Mouse," his squeaking voice said, breaking the silence, "And if I'm going to stop the Umpocalypse, I'm going to need your help."

Episode 481: Sworn Protector

June 2nd, 2020  |  9 mins 37 secs

As his blade flew, magically, back into his hand, the mouse landed in a motion that became a simple bow, aimed at the both of them.

Episode 480: Bloody Penny

May 31st, 2020  |  20 mins 14 secs

With an adorable "Hyah!" he hurled a sword the size of a toothpick past the hunter's head; the vortighast that had been creeping up behind him, hungry to suckle on his miserymarrow, screamed as its holy magics rent it into ugly dust.

Episode 479: Lil Chest

May 30th, 2020  |  12 mins 30 secs

Even the Secret Midwife couldn't completely hide her awe as a small warrior, clad in fur, goggles, and a functional but tiny leather jacket, kicked off of the seat of his motorcycle, flipping into the air even as the bike itself skidded to a perfect stop on the ground.

Episode 478: Fate's Reward

May 28th, 2020  |  12 mins 38 secs

From the corner of his eye, he saw the Secret Midwife perform a few rote identity bindings with her placental-stained fingers, masking the darker aspects of her aura even as a sudden ting from a nearby gutter announced the launching of a tiny rodent missile directly into their midst.

Episode 477: Incubus

May 26th, 2020  |  12 mins 25 secs

The hunter was just about to shatter the groaning silence when he was beaten to the beating by a tiny, whining sound, as though a small but heroic mouse was suddenly driving toward him on a very small motorcycle, or some other simile of similar force.

Episode 476: Chapter 4.5

May 24th, 2020  |  19 mins 41 secs

Their two orders had long had a professional understanding between them; hunters needed monsters to be birthed, and Midwives needed them to be slain, maintaining the whims of the dark deity Supplyanddemond.

Episode 475: 8-Inch Nails

May 23rd, 2020  |  13 mins 5 secs

As she scraped the more scrapable of the mucouses from her garment, the two stood before the long road winding its way up to the hainted manor, both harboring suspicions as to why the other might be there.

Episode 474: The Wiz

May 21st, 2020  |  13 mins 58 secs

He turned, though, in sudden shock, as a wo-manhole near him suddenly shifted; he watched and stood mute, with a mixture of horror and professional courtesy, as a Secret Midwife, resplendent in battle robes and humongous with slimes, dragged herself out of the darkness below.

Episode 473: Box Of Friends

May 19th, 2020  |  15 mins 3 secs

Bloodied and weary—despite the night still being in its grim and collicky infancy—the hunter nevertheless felt his soul lighten ever so slightly as he trudged up the street and came, at last, to the elaborate and foreboding gate of Harkhark Hoose.

Episode 472: Dangle

May 17th, 2020  |  15 mins 36 secs

Expelling the gremlin with the last drops of blesséd engine oil hidden in the thimble around his neck, Harvey gunned the bike's instantly restored engine, streaming his way through the night…like a mouse out of heaven.

Episode 471: Car Battery

May 16th, 2020  |  13 mins 16 secs

Harvey knew, better than most, that that level of clustered evil would violate the safety standards issued by the Celestial Fire Marshall, triggering a visit from The Holy Auditors; and while he had no idea WHY the forces of Umageddon wished to lure in the high heavens' hangriest bureaucrats, he knew it could bode no good.

Episode 470: Mom's Pearls

May 14th, 2020  |  13 mins 20 secs

But then he realized that the unquiet spirits were queued, in a line stretching a billions sins deep, to enter the manor over the hill.

Episode 469: Crack Jacks

May 12th, 2020  |  14 mins 12 secs

At first, he felt the slightest relief, seeing that their attention, knife-eyed and malingering, was not focused on his adorable but whiskered body.